Donz is a Fantasy Matchmaker III

We're going back to the 80's. These two bad asses also had a good side to them as well. I present to you Powercouple #3:

Jo from the Facts of Life and Officer Tom Hanson Jr. from 21 Jump Street














Joanna Marie Polniaczek, played by Nancy McKeon, was the resident bad ass from the Bronx that corrupted the girls of Eastland Academy immediately, but turned out to be A-OK. Officer Tom Hanson Jr., played by Johhny Depp, was "bad cop" that did his civic duty, posing as a high school student, and getting to the bottom of serious issues. I could see these two riding to prom together on a motorcycle.

They both look like they would be a serious powercouple even today.














FMMTY, Donz.

Donz is a Fantasy Matchmaker II

Sorry to stay with Power Rangers in this one, but this was meant to be. Power Couple #2 and Gay Power Couple #1:

Tony the Black Drummer from California Dreams and Zack the Black Power Ranger

Both were type cast, both had rhythm, and both were borderline surf dudes with attitudes. Tony was played by William James Jones and Zack was played by Walter Emanuel Jones. Were they related like Thomas and Julius Jones? Nope. Were they destined to be together? Yep.

Side Note: Saban Entertainment could have picked literally ANY color for the lone African-American main character. They chose black. Same goes for the Asian Yellow Power Ranger. Well done.

FMMTY, Donz.

Donz the Fantasy Matchmaker

OK, I am back from trip around the world, but unfortunately my computer crashed and I lost all of my pictures and blogs. Bummer. Moving on, I thought it would be a horrible idea to try and do a no holds barred matchmaking series. So here it is. No crazy rules other than that there has to be a connection made between fictional characters/people on TV or film, but they cannot be from the same show or series. Here is my first Fantasy Supercouple:

Andrea from 90210 and Billy the Blue Power Ranger













Both are intellectual, quirky, and socially awkward and both were wrongly cast as teenagers at the age of 33. I am sure they would have a shit load to talk about. Maybe Andrea will pop Billy's cherry and have another "one and done" baby episodes again? Or maybe Billy will Sanji Snap Andreas neck accidently while trying to dance with her and then build an Andrea robot that couldn't get pregnant? It could happen.

Stay tuned for more. From my mind to yourz, Donz.

A Letter to Chuck Norris from my sister

My sister Lauren, for some reason, was only recently introduced to the famous Chuck Norris Facts by an old friend of hers. This is her thoughts:

I can't decide if this dude's psychosis is funny or scary. Either way, here's my favorite "rule:"

Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.

do you think he can teach me to do this?

Dear Mr. Norris, I am a first year PhD student and I read 600 pages per week. I noticed that one of your delusional, herculean feats is to stare down books in order to attain necessary information from them. This is impressive to me. I wonder if in your spare time--when you're not brushing the teeth of a Great White shark or wrestling Osama Bin Laden into submission--you wouldn't mind teaching me this fantastic trick? And by "trick," I am of course referring to this ridiculous skill you've drummed up as a cover for the fact that you more than likely cannot read. Yeah, that's right, I said it, Chuck. But it's OK. Lots of people under the age of 3 can't read. And hey, don't forget: you're still the guy who can kill two stones with one bird. That's an enduring life skill, if I've ever heard of one. So chin up, my friend.

Yours,

L. Fanelli

This letter should be signed, sealed, and delivered. From my mind to yourz, Donz.

Why I Love the News

Something just reminded me of a news brief that I saw Tuesday that had me cracking up. It went something like this:

(Concerned) Coming up at noon, the markets continue to fall, as it looks more like a buyers’ strike than a bear rampage. The Federal Reserve is considering a new intervention in the US financial system as markets worldwide continue to plunge and the Dow continues to dip below the 10 thousand mark. (Content) In other news Beverly Hills Chihuahua continues to top the box office. We'll see you for more at noon.

We are on the brink of Armageddon, but don't worry a Disney movie about talking Chihuahuas is making millions. AMERICA... FUCK YEA!